John Cleese Quotes
30 quotes
John Cleese
British comedian, actor, writer, Monty Python co-founder, and satirist
30 Quotes
Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
— Attributed, various stage routines
Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand
— The Mysterious Stranger (published posthumously, 1916)
The duty of laughter is to remind us that life is frail and full of folly, so we must not take it too seriously
— Either/Or, Vol. 2 (1843)
Humor is not a trick, not jokes. Humor is a presence in the world—like grace—and shines on everyone
— We Are Still Married: Stories & Letters (1989)
Laughter is the closest distance between two people
— As quoted in The Speaker’s Quote Book, 1997
If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?
— Reply to accusation, presidential debate (1858)
Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain.
— The Maid of Orleans (1801), Act III, Scene VI
You can always tell a real friend: when you've made a fool of yourself, he doesn't feel you've done a permanent job
— The Peter Pyramid (1986)
The best way to cheer yourself is to try to cheer someone else up
— Attributed, exact source unknown
The problem with the world is that the intelligent people are full of doubts, while the stupid ones are full of confidence.
— Attributed in interviews and letters
Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious
— Interview, The Observer, 1969
If I had no sense of humor, I should long ago have committed suicide
— Collected Works of Mahatma Gandhi
The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.
— Diggers (1989)
Analyzing humor is like dissecting a frog. Few people are interested and the frog dies of it
— The Second Tree from the Corner, 1954
A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing
— Letter to his brother Henry James, 1878
A solemn, unsmiling, sanctimonious man, he saw not the need for humor in a universe that cannot possibly exist without it
— Orthodoxy (1908), Chapter VII: The Eternal Revolution
The human race has only one really effective weapon and that is laughter
— Essay, The Mysterious Stranger
A joke is an epigram on the death of a feeling
— Beyond Good and Evil, Section 187
If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they’ll kill you
— Attributed, various essays and conversations
Comedy is the art of making people laugh without making them puke
— Born Standing Up: A Comic's Life (2007)
Humor is mankind’s greatest blessing
— Attributed, speeches and essays
Wit is the lowest form of humor but the highest form of intelligence
— Attributed aphorism, letters and conversations
No one is exempt from talking nonsense; the mistake is to do it solemnly.
— Essais, Book III, Chapter XIII
Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh
— The Doctor's Dilemma (1906)
A day without laughter is a day wasted
— Attributed, interviews with Chaplin
I can resist everything except temptation
— Lady Windermere's Fan (1892)
The secret source of humor is not joy but sorrow; there is no humor in Heaven
— Following the Equator (1897)
To succeed in life, you need two things: ignorance and confidence
— Attributed, various sources
I think the next best thing to solving a problem is finding some humor in it
— . Columnist writings, 20th century
Everything is funny, as long as it’s happening to somebody else
— Daily Telegrams, 1929